Archive for February, 2012

Life is Funny

02/15/2012

…not always “funny ha-ha,” but always funny.

I’ve been applying to jobs pretty consistently lately (no, I didn’t get that one at the non-profit that most of you are aware of) with no little success.  I say little because I have had a couple interviews, which have gone well, but they’ve all “decided to go another direction.”  It’s a cross between soul-crushing, frustrating, and amusing, and no, I can’t really explain the last one.

Other than that I’m trying to come to terms with other aspects of my life.  I’m taking the hope that maybe by ordering other aspects of my life, I’ll have success in the job department.  I’ve been trying to eat healthier, trying to sleep more regularly (that’s not going well, but who’s surprised really?  Hell, part of the reason this is being posted so early is the fact that I haven’t been able to sleep today).

I’ve also been evaluating things in my life and trying to see what I want/need to change and what things I can continue.  This is everything from, “Do I want to start reading more books of type x,” to, “Should I become a Buddhist monk and move to Tibet?”  Okay…so that last one’s a bit extreme and isn’t one I’m really considering, but there are major changes, most of which are private(ish), and thus probably won’t be discussed here.

Through all of the above, I’m trying to keep my head up, but it’s hard.  One of the things I’m trying to do to help myself stay positive is remembering that, in reality, most (read: all) of my problems really are First World Problems.  Though that phrase is usually attached to people bitching about stupid things to mock them, when it comes down to it, my problems really are first world problems.  I do have a roof over my head (I’d like to maintain that, but I’m not directly in danger of losing that, either).  I do eat daily (unless I forget – it’s a thing, don’t judge me).  I do have a computer on which I’m writing this, which also has an Internet connection.  Yeah, I really, really want a big-boy job (at this point, if it was 40 hours a week with health care and a reasonable salary, I’d drive up to an hour for it without blinking), and yeah, my personal life/feelings are tumultuous, but I don’t have it that bad.  There is no one actively attempting to murder me.  I am not afraid of the elements or starvation.  I just need to get the fuck over myself and keep grinding.

Update ahoy!

02/08/2012

I’m not really up to writing a whole big post, so I’ll just write you all a quick update.

My life is going pretty good, if not a little repetitive right now.  I’m in that, “Job search, apply, repeat,” stage and waiting to hear back from somewhere, hopefully.  My sleep schedule’s all sorts of wacky right now with random intervals of sleep spread between 11 PM and the following day’s 1 PM, ranging from 10 minutes to a couple hours.  I’ve been using melatonin a little bit with mixed results, but the stuff I have says not to use it for more than 7 days in a row because your body will build a tolerance to it…so…there’s that.

Mostly, right now, I’m trying to wade through and keep my head up.  I know I’m employable, and I know that I’ll eventually find the right job…it’s just the waiting and the not having it that kinda suck.